EZFKNZ PM Jacinda Ardern brokered the deal last week in New York, after a meeting with CEO Larry Fink to save NZ’s housing market and rescue the land-owning class. The deal also secures exclusive naming rights for BlackRock to the North Island.
Chris Carnegie, from Lismore, lost his house, small business and all of his possessions in the flooding and has been living in a tent for weeks with no assistance from government or anyone else.
The self-described ‘insufferable fuckwit’ stated that Australians needed to rethink their lifestyle and consumption habits if they can’t afford it. Cannon-Brookes used the opportunity to promote his personal investments of cricket flour while eating a gas-cooked bbq snag from his local RSL.
Jane Crenshaw, from Indooripilly, who tweeted ‘GREENSLAND’ just after the election, further tweeted that having no electricity was just the price to pay to save the planet.
They were joined in solidarity with crime sprees by Kiwis in Melbourne and South Brisbane, after Jacinda Ardern managed to secure the deal and wash her hands of her citizens’ wrongdoings as she loses control of crime in NZ.
After being told by every legal institution in the country that their claims were fabricated bullshit and costing the Australian public millions, the Nadesalingam family plan to put their feet up in the country where they claim they can never go back to.
The All Blacks will now be known as the ‘All BlackRocks’ after CEO Larry Fink was displeased with New Zealand’s ESG score and demanded the name change in line with World Economic Forum policies.
Rob Willis, from Northcote, stated that pensioners unable to pay their gas bill due to inflation and domestic gas policy was not his problem and that ‘greedy boomers brought it on themselves.’
Anthony Albanese, Australian Prime Minister, just in the first month of his job, has already had to deal with a major crisis: shortages of lettuce. “Clearly, the unprecedented floods in QLD and NSW are the direct result of horrible climate policy by the Liberal Government that also caused a significant increase in everyday cost of … Read more
Australians took to the streets to thank the WEF for the controlled demolition of their country, with a statue for RBA governor Phil Lowe being proposed in Sydney.
Phil Lowe said he was already working with Black Rock to facilitate residential real estate purchases in the coming months.
Paul McFarlane, 52, was rushed to hospital suffering chest pains and a suspected heart attack and then waited outside on a stretcher for 8 hours before dying.