Minister Sinister
As the flights to EZFKA return, foreign students say they are already looking to do fuck all and get their degrees off the backs of locals, while checking out the property market for their parents.
Capp says the move will hopefully drive property prices back up to sustainable levels while international students remain outside EZFKA.
The strain was uncovered right after the new Omicron variant was released last week, sending thousands of EZFKA residents back under their bed and reaching for the Depends.
The study, conducted by the Cash For Comment institute, has found that the latest Omnicron variant has appeared just as protest numbers nationwide reach record numbers and Victoria is set to vote on the permanent pandemic legislation.
Under the new rule, teams would be allowed to forfeit if too many players collapse from heart attacks during the game, however the opposing side would be awarded the win and the three points. Forfeit would also mean automatic elimination from the FFA Cup.
The video, released on Youtube last night by the Corporate Media Are Fucking Cringe Assciation, is a detailed instructional to de-program your family members and stop them from listening to anything David Koch or Natalie Barr says.
The struggling hospitality sector, which spent the last 18 months bending over for government mandates, is delighted that cheap imported labour is back to save the day and the EZFKA spirit of exploitation is in vogue again.
“We’ve tried labelling them Nazis over and over again, but people can see that’s just a complete wank. God help us if they ever read about what the Bolsheviks did because it is Soviet Russia all over again.”
After winning the Controlled Opposition of the Year Award, Guy said he’s more than prepared to sell out the Victorian public and has a proven track record of doing so, as the Andrews government struggles to find a deciding vote.
Lambie is apparently under the care of Baphomet until further notice.
Meddick gave several versions of events on 3AW, but says his story will change as new information comes to light.
Lowe slammed suggestions that he should actually do something and confirmed that with borders re-opening negative rates aren’t needed ‘just yet.’