Qantas announces heavily discounted flights to anyone who wants to fly with a vaccinated pilot

Qantas CEO Alan Joyce has announced a new program to kickstart tourism in EZFKA, with a new line of heavily discounted ‘insurance waiver’ flights to anyone who wants to roll the dice with a vaccinated pilot.

Flights will be discounted up to 80% in some cases, particularly long haul flights when international borders re-open. Astra Zeneca and Pfizer will both be sponsoring the initiative, which is part of Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s plan to restart Australian tourism.

“It’s like the mystery flights we used to have back in the 90’s. Only this time instead of not knowing your destination, it’s not knowing if you’ll get to your destination,” Joyce said.

“You also won’t know want vaccines the pilot has had. So, it could be mid-flight myocarditis or deep vein thrombosis, who knows, the possibilities are endless!”

The flights will start later this month.

5 2 votes
Article Rating
17 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Agent 47

Jokes aside, family member is stood down Qantas pilot and he refused to take the jab for this very reason. Majorly concerned about increase risk of DVT.

He reckons this is main reason pilot mates in the US at three major airlines walked off the job and got them to back down from mandating jabs.

Interesting times ahead.

Peachy

EZFKA pilots won’t walk off, though, or Alan will replace them with nice compliant Singaporean/Filipino pilots, like he did the crew, won’t ‘e?

stagmal

maybe he can get some from malaysia too!

Peachy

For sure

Agent 47

They’ll all be replaced by AI in a few years time, even though autopilot essentially does 90% of the flying these days anyway.

bjw678

Yeah,nah.
Gotta have a pilot to put the blame on when something goes wrong.

Winning@Failing

Shilling this joint on MB lol, you shameless cunt. Reckon you’ll tempt many over?

It only misses that unusually fast speech ending: “This message was brought to you by Malaysia Airlines – We land you to places never heard of before”

Reus's Large MEMBER

I would happily take the jab if I could get on a flight and throw that pesky leprechaun out at 30 000ft

Chinese Astroturfer

Nasty little puncher. Parts of his body would be an infection vector.

ThePensum

different rules for the wealthy and celebrities:

https://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/health-environment/article/3145619/coronavirus-hong-kong-confirms-nicole-kidman

and she flew out of Australia

ThePensum

and the fucking irony is that she is filming a tv show about “Expats”…. lol

Peachy

That dirty fcken ranga wench can piss right off.

Agent 47

Agree.

Travis Howarth

It’s arguable the Kidman family are used to exceptional treatment. Just ask her dad (if you could).

Coming

What do you mean

Travis Howarth

Her dad died under the cloud of a range of allegations. Some of the less mainstream media sites around the place seem to suggest there was a blind eye turned to it over the years.